Influencer takes a mental health break due to burnout from doing her 10th haul video of the day.

 Mumbai, MH-- 23-year-old fashion influencer, Alvaira Naira posted on Instagram yesterday evening to her 300 followers that she was going to take a 1-month sabbatical from posting 10 Zara hauls a day. 'Itz really stressful you guys, like being a content creator is not easy you know. Like shopping for clothes, like all day and like wearing them in front of a camera is sooo exhausting y'all. On top of all the work I do, I have to also cook food to eat, clean my house and go to pilates class every day. Like, it's like I just feel so overwhelmed yaa, you know with all work I have to do. But I still work hard to bring you guys similar kuthi's in different colors from different brands cuz I luv you guyz and the family we have created online. But don't worry I'll be back once a brand offers me enough money to suck its dick or I need validation from you peasants, whichever is earlier. You guys can use codeALV in the meantime to get 10 percent off on the shoelace I'm wearing in this video. Something to tide you all over during my 1-month sabbatical, byeee guyzz, don't miss me too much ', said Alvaira in her last Instagram reel. 

13-year-old boy reported dead after being put on a 30-day almond diet to increase his intelligence.

 

Bangalore, KA-- Residents of Bangalore are mourning the death of R. Ahmed, who passed away at S.t Mary hospital yesterday after being fed only almonds for breakfast, lunch and dinner by his parents to stop him from failing his math test in school. 'We tried everything we could to get him to focus on his studies, right from locking him up in a room at school in the morning to imprisoning him at the tuition center in the evenings. From crushing his hobby of drawing and cricket under our foot to banning him from talking to girls. Yet he kept on crying himself to sleep every night and failing math exams.', his devastated mother was reported saying to the reporters. It was Ahmed's uncle who recommended putting him on the 30 day almond diet, as suggested to him by WhatsApp forward, who had received great results experimenting with the diet on his own daughter. 'Depression is a luxury, when I was your age, I was swimming 8km and running through hot coal to get to school. If you spent less time looking at your phone, your brain would still be working', Ahmed's father was quoted saying when Ahmed mention going to a therapist. According to reports, students from Ahmed's class were protesting the loss of the 5 min they could have spent finishing a trigonometry sum instead of observing a moment of silence to honor Ahmed. 

Netizens stunned to find out that when a fuckboi marries a gold-digger there are consequences.

Mumbai, MH- Netizens of Indian Social Networking Sites found themselves embroiled in a scintillating discourse about the lives and divorce of 2 people wholly unconnected to them on Friday afternoon after the news of the divorce of cricketer Yuzvendra Chahal broke out. 'It is unfair that Chahal is required to pay alimony of 4.75 crore to his wife. That poor 35-year-old man has been scammed by a cunning feminazi gold digger with a super tight pussy grip, and he doesn't even know it. It is our responsibility to save him. ', says a 13-year-old virgin who spent the whole afternoon masturbating to Andrew Tate's interviews after his mom grounded him for failing his geography exam. According to reports coming out of India, men are taking bold steps to lie about the imaginary assets they have to their imaginary wife to be arranged by their parents in the future, so that they can just use her for sex and unpaid labor without unnecessary hassle. One mathematical whiz among the netizens who prepared and shared a cost benefit analysis of marrying to have sex for the first time and says-' I created this excel spreadsheet because I love math and also, I'm unemployed, so I enjoy projecting my own insecurities onto celebrities who have no idea I exist.' 

Indian Mother tries rainwater harvesting after she mistakes her daughter's tears for rain

Chennai, TN - Indian mother living in Chennai, Tamil Nadu, expresses astonishment at her daughter's tears and the fact that she has actual feelings after an incident involving the daughter not cleaning up the kitchen after cooking herself some pasta led to arguments between the mother daughter duo. 'I carried this girl in my stomach for 9 months, birthed her, fed her, clothed her and gave her a roof over her head. Isn't it her duty to repay me for all the money I've spent on her by being my emotional punchbag because no one has taught me emotional self-regulation.?' reports the mother as she berates her daughter by listing out everything wrong, she has done in her life till now. Neighbours report that they had thought that the family was celebrating some good news by bursting firecrackers only to reach their house only to deduce that it was the mother who was thrilling her daughter with vocal pyrotechnics. The father was seen hiding out in his office during the duration of the fight and later was heard saying that, 'As parents we have eaten 24090 more bowls of rice that has made our brain grow twice the size of the protein shake drinking Genz kids, we cannot possibly be wrong about anything. '

Wedding MUA has a mental breakdown after she realizes that a wedding can infact go on without her

BANGALORE, KA -- On Tuesday at 7:00 p.m. eyewitness at the Dolly and Duke wedding, report seeing the 'No.1 MUA of Bangalore' breaking down in tears as she realized that it was the bride and not her who was the most important part of the wedding and that the wedding can in fact go on without her. 'It's kinda Crazy how the bride expected all of us to be punctual and arrive at least 4 hours before the wedding. Our philosophy as MUA's is why be early and waste time doing makeup at a slow and steady pace one step at time, when we can do the same shit at a breakneck speed racing against the clock. If the bride develops an ulcer from the stress of incessantly calling us to come fast and get her ready before the muhurtham, then she should try meditation. You know to calm her mind. '', said the fifth assistant to the 'No.1MUA of Bangalore', who confirmed that the makeup team arrived at the wedding hall exactly an hour before the wedding to a harried and an angry bride. It has now been revealed that the inciting incident at the center of the mental breakdown of the 'No.1 MUA of Bangalore' was the deranged bride, who was enraged at the cheap foundation that was used, which was the color of white paint leading the bride to look like Casper the friendly ghost from the neck up, who had put on a bright red lipstick with hot neon pink eyeshadow. 'How can the bride possibly know about what suits her and her features and her complexion even after being alive on this earth for 22 years. It is the responsibility of a capable, first-class MUA to cake enough makeup on the bride's face to the point where she wondered, if she was meeting a long-lost twin her parents didn't tell her about as she gazed into the mirror.' officials reported the MUA saying during the investigation. The breakdown of the 'No.1 MUA of Bangalore' was also exacerbated by the escalating unreasonable demands made by the bride, such as her request to remove everything and start the makeup again from scratch, reported the 2nd assistant to the MUA. On the other side, the bride's sister who was also present by the bride the entire time, reported that the situation became unsalvageable leading to the bride firing the MUA only after the MUA and her assistants made the bride cry by passing mean comments. 'Kids of today are soo sensitive. I'm scared to say anything now a days because someone or the other gets offended by it. I only told her she should have lost some weight and managed her body before the wedding and applied lime juice on her face to lighten her skin tone. I was even gracious enough to invite her to my salon to thread the unibrow she had making her look like a geriatric school principal.' the exasperated No.1 MUA of Bangalore is reported saying to everyone who would listen. 

How to be a toxic boyfriend 101 feat. Arnav Singh Raisada

 When it came to the TV remote in our house, the line of hierarchy was set in stone. Weekends were for my dad and his obsession with obscure documentaries about an elephant leading her heard through the African savanna and watching Dhoni hit a six during IPL. If you think that me and my brother could at least spend the weekdays after school watching nobita get bullied by Suneo and Gyaan (which honestly deserved- that creep was watching Shizuka bath), well you thought wrong. Enter my mother with all her TV serials which start at 5 p.m in the evening and ends well after we've gone to bed at 10 p.m. Ask me today, I would say Indian serials are the bottom of the barrel entertainment, where logic is optional, actors overact with a dramatic 'domta domta dherena' playing in the background, where in every family there is that one bitch who gets up to crazy shenanigans and just can't let the female lead live in peace. One moment, the lead character is happily married, and the next, they find out they have a twin sibling who is out to kill her, and she has married her stepbrother or some shit. However, when I was in school, my intellectual capabilities and neural circuitry were overridden and highjacked by the hotness of Barun Sobti aka, Arnav Singh Raizada, who set the standard for the man I planned to marry in future. Along with Kushi Kumari Gupta, the lead actress, they were the perfect love story, and I swore to myself, If I didn't have a love story like them, I would rather die alone. 

Now as a fully grown adult with a mature, developed prefrontal cortex, I happened across some of the clips of the serial on YouTube, and decided to rewatch some of the it. As I write this post today, I'm confused. This cannot be the same serial with which my mother blackmailed me into completing my trigonometry homework. This was not the show I loved and eagerly waited all day to watch. Arnav Singh Raizada I remembered was a hot, brooding, smirking, intense, coconut on the outside-marshmallow on the inside kinda man. However, the reality I had to reconcile with as I watched the clips one after another was that Arnav Singh Raizada was an arrogant, emotionally constipated man who pretty much harassed Kushi into falling in love with him. This guy locks her in a dark room, physically intimidates her, accuses her of being a gold digger, rips of the tie on the back of her blouse for absolutely no reason and this is just their first meeting. He spends half the serial misunderstanding something or the other about Kushi, starting an argument, screaming at the poor girl even as she tries to explain the situation to him and then finding out later that he was an absolute dumbass with poor listening skills and had the emotional depth of a robot, coming to the realization at the end that -'Oh it was a misunderstanding and Kushi was innocent-this means I like her, but no I can't like her because I'm a manchild with no self-awareness,', and then proceeds to have an emotional breakdown and rinse and repeat over 200 episodes. My man, you need therapy, not love. On the other hand, Kushi Kumari Gupta, is a beautiful woman but also incredibly dumb and highly slow on the uptake. Like girl, if he's grabbing you so hard that you have to hide the imprint of his hands by covering yourself with a dupatta, best believe his red flags are brighter than the red marks he left on you. It takes delusion on another level to come to the conclusion that this guy who spends half of his time treating you like you're beneath him and the other half taunting you about your low social status to satisfy his own ego, secretly loves you.  Kids don't fall for this kinda bullshit; these are the kind of guys who get booked under POSH for sexual harassment.

The best character in this serial is also ironically the one I hated when I was young, because I thought she was keeping Kushi and Arnav apart. Arnav's girlfriend (who becomes his ex-girlfriend)- Lavanya. She's gorgeous, intelligent, has a career and a fashion sense Kushi could only dream of, but because this is India and we are filled top to bottom with 'sanskar', a women's worth here is only determined by how good the pakora she makes are and how much willing she is to lose her personality and her independence to fit into her Huband's family. Lavanya has been Arnav's girlfriend for a while now and just like any sane, normal women she wants to marry her boyfriend. This makes sense right. Now instead of sitting this girl down and telling her he doesn't want to marry her like a man, we watch about 50 episodes Arnav being a little ass bitch and his family trying to make her sanskari, because if you wear miniskirts instead of sarees, of course you are a characterless girl unworthy of marrying your boyfriend of 5 years. I'm not even kidding; his family actually enlists Kushi to teach her 'sanskar'. And if you're wondering how the fuck does one teaches 'sanskar' and what does that even entail, watch Kushi spending all day instructing this foreign educated career women who works shoulder to shoulder with Arnav in the office, make jelabis in the kitchen in the morning and labor for the 100 different pujas this family does in the evening. The whoop I let out when this woman breaks up with Arnav, I swear to God. She chooses her dignity and self-respect before a man and girl--RESPECT.

While the serial had its faults, one thing was undeniable-the romantic chemistry between the leads. Hot, Intense, electric. Both the actors basically hardcarried this show on their backs and damn do they look good together.  The writing of the show and the banter between the leads are hilarious to watch even today. And I'll always feel nostalgic about the OST of Rabba Ve in the background and they gazed intensely into each other's eyes. They created the perfect fantasy for me to escape into as a child and I will always look back fondly on Arnav's popular dialogue - 'What the'. While I would never fall in love with Arnav in real life, the only thing I wish and pray for from God is for my future significant other to have at least 10 percent of the hotness of Arnav Singh Raizada. Pleeseeeeeeeeeeeeeee